To Love Others, We Need to Learn to Love Ourselves First…
I read and re-read and read again this quote and thought a lot… Something was holding me back from accepting that these words are true… So True!
Growing up we learn to love others, to treat others how we would like to be treated, and this got me thinking: Do I have to treat others like I would like others to treat me or should I treat others like I treat myself?
Yes here is the tricky part… We treat others well expecting that automatically they will treat us well and all so we can be happy.
Now how can we Love others and treat others well if we don’t know how to treat ourselves and we don’t know how to love ourselves…?
Love ourselves sometimes might make us feel selfish… is it? No, it isn’t!
Self Love is not selfish is an act of altruism towards the people we love…
Now, how can we work on self-love? How can we start loving ourselves even though we are not 100% happy with who we are?
First of all, we need to forgive ourselves and free ourselves of self-judgement, we must be kind to ourselves as we would be kind to a child. Did ever happen to you that a child would tell you for example: “I’m not good in drawing” or “I’m not good in reading” or worst did it ever happen to you that a child would tell you “I’m stupid”? If it happened I’m sure that at that moment your heart shrank and you tried in all possible ways to make the child change its mind by telling him\her that it’s not true and most probably you made a quick list of the things the child was very good at trying your best to make their negative thought about themselves disappear, right? Well, this is what you must do for yourself too… You need to baby yourself and be kind to you by erasing immediately thoughts that put you down and change them with thoughts that elevate you.
Our daily Mantra Meditation (Morning Mantra *14) is a start to our self-love development from now we are going to extend the exercise to make sure that step by step you will become a person that loves yourself and is happy with who you are.
Today the exercise is very simple I would like you to make a list of things that you don’t like about yourself, things that you want to change, things you want to get better at it could be health, your career, relationships whatever comes to your mind. I would like you to make a list of daily things you tell to yourself. When your list is completed I would like you to imagine yourself as a child and under everything you wrote I would like you to write what you would say to the little child to make her/him feel better.
This exercise is very important to start our journey to self-love. I did it, so I’ll tell you exactly how I felt after… I wrote down all the things I think I don’t do right, Why I think I don’t do them right, what I don’t like about myself and why… I thought about what is the worst thing I call myself (or Better I used to call myself) by the way it was “Idiot” I use to say all the time to my self “oh you’re such an Idiot!” After the exercise I started to laugh, I started to write the opposite of the negative things so I wrote things like “You are not an idiot because you decided to change your profession, you are brave and will do amazing…” and it’s amazing how we human beings can change how we feel and the way our day is going by just changing a simple word in a phrase… After the exercise, I felt relieved I felt as I could achieve anything and looking at myself in the mirror I even felt better looking… I felt like if somebody had pushed out my neck and suddenly I was taller (weird no?) I than discovered that when we love ourselves our self-esteem grows and we walk straighter so yes we get taller…
Try to follow the Me On Focus exercises, we are developing many many little exercises to improve yourself and get everything you deserve from this life. The exercises will be simple and short, every day we will post a little exercise. Try to keep a separate journal for your exercises and share with us your improvements and how you are feeling.
If you need more explanations about the exercises please write me an email by using the Contact form or write to me how you are feeling after doing the exercise. Are you meditating with us with our Morning Mantra * 14? Let me know how you are feeling?
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